ashtmatic kitten and i are talking again.
hoping for bigger things for the future.
reconciled? i hope so. <3
hindi lahat ng pagmamahal ay sapat. ito lang ang mensahe ng blog na ito. may nagmamahal pero mas may nagmamahal ng sobra, at sa mga ganung pagkakataon, laging may nasasaktan.
ito na ang huling post ng blog na ito. simula mamaya ng 00:01, pormal ko ng isinasara ang halos isang taong hindi ko rin masyadong mahusay na naikwento tungkol sa pangungulila ko sa isang tao.
paalam asthmatic kitten. pinuputol ko na ang relasyon natin tulad ng unang pagputol mo nito. holding on never really does anything good, that much i know now. (=_=)
dumating ka noong 10.2009.
hindi pa tayo naguusap mula 12.27.09
fine.
paalam.
8 more days ’til she comes home.Ü
…neko is back and she needs to be good to her commitments. only a few months til the asthmatic kitten comes back home.
a lot of unfurled yarn to rewound.
(01:13:19) nene: ow..hehe! safe pa naman ang jerusalem sbi ni yehuda although my mga nagtra-try pumasok na suicide bomber..kaya mahigpit ang security..
(01:13:58) neko: KAMUSTA NAMAN YUN!!!!!
(01:19:29) nene: hehe
(01:19:58) neko: bat pati jerusalem? eh di ba neutral kayo?!!
(01:22:09) nene: ndi, hati ang Jerusalem… the West belongs to the palentinian Arabs while the East belongs to the Jews.. and gusto ng mga Arabs sakupin lahat pero ayaw syempre ng mga Jews..
(01:22:45) neko: eh dapat hindi gnun
(01:22:49) neko: waaaaaaaaaaah
(01:22:53) neko: umuwi ka na!!! bilis
(01:22:55) neko: gabi na!!!
(01:23:00) neko: anubear?!!!!
(01:23:05) neko: go go og
(01:23:06) neko: *go
(01:24:02) neko: do not compromise your safety!
(01:24:42) nene: safe nmn dito noh.. nasa ends of the earth kme..hehe
(01:25:23) neko: no one is safe-safe. 
war is expensive and capricious! think: 9/11. did anybody expect that? NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(01:29:04) neko: GAZA CITY, Gaza Strip – Israel obliterated symbols of Hamas power on the third day of what the defense minister described Monday as a “war to the bitter end,” striking next to the Hamas premier’s home, and devastating a security compound and a university building.
(01:31:47) nene: owkie, uwi nko.. gutom na din ako..hehe!
(01:31:51) neko: sagot ng white house: “We are encouraging all the nations in the region to take an active part in rebuilding the ceasefire so that we can return to the relative calm that was enjoyed in the region over the past six months,” he told reporters. “We are working for a cease-fire now where Hamas must stop its rocket attacks on Israel. All sides then need to respect the ceasefire.”
(01:31:54) neko: uwi na!!!
(01:32:04) neko: magtext ka pag bahay ka na.
(01:32:09) neko: ingat nene okay?
(01:32:11) neko: i love you
(01:32:24) neko: bring your passport and money with you EVERYWHERE!!!!
(01:32:34) nene: owkie..log out knb?
(01:32:34) neko: everywhere. you hear me????!!!
(01:32:37) neko: i love you
(01:32:44) neko: nope – i might wait for you to come home
(01:32:46) neko: ping me
(01:32:52) neko: then i’ll sleep na
(01:32:54) nene: owkie
(01:32:59) nene: loveyou
(01:33:00) nene: bye
(01:33:03) neko: love you!!
see? huhuhu. please keep her safe…
there’s a war in gaza – okay, war is the norm there. but it seemed a zillion miles away (before) for me to really take an active stance thus sympathies would have to suffice. fast track to today: heller, andun yung kapatid ko! ano ako hilo?!!! everything’s so personal now for me, i mean, everything gaza, palestine, israel. the whole conflict! and if i weren’t nervous enought, define staging an airstrike. AN AIRSTIKE! i.am.gonna.faint.
hay nene, all my 25 years – o sige, at least all the years in my sad, little, life when i realized i love you to pluto and back and that i will give anything and everything just to keep you safe, i TRIED to cover you… even to the point of me meddling. i did with good intentions.
grrr… i’m just worried. yes, you told me that you’re relatively far from gaza. even yehuda, through his letter, mentioned that they are prepared and that there is no need to worry – but try telling that to a heart that knows nothing but to protect. haha. isama mo pa si mama sa akin…
i can still remember how you smiled last night when i told you to bring all your money and your important docs with you everywhere you go. sabi mo paranoid talaga ako. ganun din yun sinabi mo nung nag wee-wee break ka at iniwan mo ang laptop mo sa student center habang asa kabilang linya ako ng webcam na talaga namang eagle-eyed sa pagmamatyag kung may kukuha… di ba tumawa ka kasi sabi mo walang nangingialam ng gamit diyan dahil akala nila bomb?!! guess what? – sabi ni mama, tama ako. HAHAHA! kaya nene, dalhin mo ang passport at pera mo lagi.
and come home safe. text me always.
i am too young to die thinking about you. 
labshu!
… pasko na! at walang pasok sa January 2. 
she’d send me e-mails with panda-versions of us and i’d go over the moon because of joy. they’re virtual visits sent to my inbox, received by my heart. because she was busy with school and extra curriculars as i was busy too – coping… missing her – we both had to find a way to bridge the geographical gap.
aren't we cute? haha
then came reality creeping from behind and the blog was forgotten – this blog. the “sister void” in my heart was temporarily patched with work and work… i still waited for her at night and sent offline messages, texted her with well wishes. but chronos – darn you – was too selfish to give me a few of my sister’s time. it’s either we talk and catch up, or i end up tired and sluggish. it’s not something selfish i think, but i came to understand even more that long-distance relationships even at a level so intimate as that which my sister and i share have to be weighed against something. real life relationships and career are really mutually exclusive. they are never to blend, like oil and water. work-life balance is a myth.
- the price of reality. sigh.
but we managed to get wind of each other. thank you facebook. you won over 6 years of self-imposed hermitage and became the next best “institutional” channel of keeping up with each one’s busy life.
the chagall place: maf, nene and yaz
so, her activities, let’s see: nene was able to visit the famous chagall windows, she also participated in the jewish version of arbor day – planting trees in mount eitan she did. have i told you about yad vashem? tears momentarily misted her eyes as she looked at remnants of the holocaust.
then there’s school and all her researches, all spent alone in the student center. i need not tell you guys of course that i so wanted to just be there with her enjoying a book beside her while she tapped, deleted and sighed in front of her laptop just like what we usually did when she was still here.
good times.
nene was here!!!
in a hour, it’ll be officially christmas. my first away from nene. since yesterday, a big lump of emotion has been clogging my throat because i miss her – to pluto and back much… on the morning of her flight, i mentioned to her that she has to go not only to help her grow as a person – to diversify and hone her skills so that she can fulfill God’s mission for her in this generation – but to also teach us, those who were left “temporarily”, what it is still has to clear – maybe in a few months, it’ll come to me, at least, i what other lessons i should be learning from this experience (like maybe having my own life, letting others in too, carving my own niche…) however, for now – especially today, all i know is that i thank Him who made us family so much because i appreciate my sister so much more than i did. that family is forever, and as my stubborn memory would remind me “mama is mama” per papa. story to be told in a separate blog. ^_^
but nene, amidst all these things that i say – i really feel somber without you here. no one to cook mashed potato with, no one else but you knows what i mean by a “large medipack”, and more than that i miss you period.
there is a growing, gnawing feeling in the pit of my stomach which no amount of tender juicy hotdogs can cover.
christmas is blue without you kiddo. hurry home. i’m gonna throw a big party for you!
i love you and merry christmas!
love – ate.
p.s. peter, paul and mary made me cry. hahah. and the old folks send you their love. magtext ka naman daw.
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- aren’t we cute? haha
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- the chagall place: maf, nene and yaz
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- nene was here!!!
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- gellato!
yes.
fully? not quite.
it’s been quite a while since my last post – don’t worry, the loooooooooooong vacation will find me chained to nene’s old lappy updating this blog.
soon, little grasshopper. neko will tell you stories of nene again.
mwah!
